


The Scars of You and Me

by Rainieva



Category: Critical Role (Web Series), Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Boys In Love, First Kiss, Fluff, I'm so sorry, Its late and the tags are a mess, Love Confessions, M/M, Scars, caleb's scars, cant remember the episode number, not too detailed but I'll tag anyway, spoilers for ep. 100ish?, the one with the party, yOU kNoW the pArTy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-03
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-10 10:07:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27849058
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rainieva/pseuds/Rainieva
Summary: The first time the marks appeared, he was fascinated.Essek Thelyss had done his own fair share of research on the mysterious workings of 'soulmates'. Hearing about them as a child left him more confused than the typical starry eyed drow. He'd lived his life believing in the arcane of which could be proven and studied. Soulmates were neither.~~~Or, a typical Soulmate AU where Essek and Caleb share scars.
Relationships: Essek Thelyss/Caleb Widogast
Comments: 6
Kudos: 165





	The Scars of You and Me

**Author's Note:**

> Whoops! I tripped over this thing in my Google Docs. Here, please take it. 
> 
> This is a Soulmate AU where your soulmate's scars appear on your body in the same place and vice versa. (Wow, original. Can you see where this is going? Lol)
> 
> Anyway, this was sitting in my head for a few days and it been a while since I've done any Soulmate AUs. Please enjoy!

The first time the marks appeared, he was fascinated.

Essek Thelyss had done his own fair share of research on the mysterious workings of 'soulmates'. Hearing about them as a child left him more confused than the typical starry eyed drow. He'd lived his life believing in the arcane of which could be proven and studied. Soulmates were neither.

While many have found their so-called soulmates and sworn up and down how meaningful it was, there was little reliable information on the subject. Most books on the matter sounded more like mediocre romantic fiction than anything of substance. Still, there were people who found that mysterious marks and scars to injuries they have never received appeared on their skin.

It seemed that these abnormalities didn't hurt when appearing but always matched a corresponding one on another person on this plane. This person would be the source of whatever wound had befallen them and vice versa. So, after decades of nothing gracing his skin, small circular discolorations began littering his forearms.

There had only been a few at first, near the elbow, but quickly spread down both of his arms. Essek studied them carefully. The scars were not only - presumably - the sign of a soulmate, but they were not scars like anything he'd ever seen. They were uniform and sickeningly perfect; sickeningly deliberate.

His mind went wild with possibilities as to what could have caused the strange scars and why. Far later than he'd like to admit, he remembered just what they signified. Someone, somewhere was meant to be his soulmate. He was instantly horrified by the intense feelings of longing and sympathy that overwhelmed him. He'd never been someone who needed the comfort of interpersonal relationships but in a matter of weeks, he was left awake early into the morning, thoughts centered on an individual he'd never met.

One such night - or perhaps early morning - Essek pushed the palms of his hands into the hollows of his eyes, rubbing insistently like doing so will force trance to come to him. Resigning to not get any sort of rest, the drow stood from his bed and walked the length of the room to a personal desk he kept in his room for nights - or mornings - like this one.

The wizard sat down and flipped through the loose papers strewn across the desk. The Dynasty tried to keep a close watch on soulmates as they can complicate the reincarnation process of the Luxon. While the soulmate would often stay the same, transcending bodies and destiny but there have been cases in which the soulmate changed. Some theorized it was because their true soulmate hadn't been born during their previous lifetime however, Essek couldn't bring himself to believe such sentimentality existed. Surely there had to be a logical explanation for this odd phenomenon. 

Years past and the scars multiplied. While the strange circular marks on his arms remained, numerous - while much more natural appearing - scars began to appear all over his body. A thin slash across his cheek, a much larger wound to the abdomen, he'd even found gashes along his back while dressing one day. Most of the smaller ones faded with time, like any other scar would, but the ones on his arms remained.

With his typical mantle, people hardly caught a glimpse of his arms, so he never felt the need to cover them. Besides, soulmates were a common occurrence and could be easily explained. However, his mother was much more displeased with the news of his apparent 'soulmate'. Being an Umavi, she'd been through many lives and just as many soulmates. She'd told Essek that they were not to be heeded with any real scrutiny which had only made him that more determined to find the answers to his questions. So, if only adding to the reasons for her to be dissatisfied in him, he still studied the subject.

Then, a ragtag group of mercenaries found their way to an audience with the Bright Queen, herself. He'd found them intriguing if not foolish when they'd first spoken of their deeds, closing abyssal portals and the like. The conversation had turned sour quickly when a redheaded man in a long brown coat and scarf reached into an enchanted pink bag and presented a Beacon. One of the Beacons he'd helped smuggle out of the Dynasty. Essek had felt himself seize up in fear. Hundreds of questions and probable worst case scenarios cycled through his head before the Bright Queen had called to him, instructing him to look after them during their time in the Dynasty.

Of course, he'd agreed. Even if he'd had a choice, he needed to be close to these people in order to learn what they knew. He carefully questioned them under the guise of a concerned official and subject of the Dynasty. They appeared to know very little about the Beacon and it's dunamantic capabilities. However, the redheaded wizard - he quickly learned his name was Caleb - seemed to be incredibly enthusiastic at the prospect of learning. 

So, he taught him. Something about him made him feel some sort of kinship. He quickly learned the wizard was incredibly clever and a fast learner. He found he enjoyed his long hours in his tower more with Caleb there to bounce theories off of. So, when he felt compelled to ask him about his opinions on soulmates, he wasn't exactly surprised.

"What does the Empire think about soulmates?" He'd disguised his interests in hopes it didn't come across as probing.

"Hm," He'd hummed in thought before continuing. "Depends on who you ask. The people around me tended to see it as a nuisance or a distraction."

"And you?" The drow dared to press.

Caleb was thoughtful for a moment before letting his pale blue eyes meet the drow's. "I'm not sure. I thought I knew who mine was but evidently, I was wrong."

Essek nodded, understanding. 

"What about you, Thelyss? I'm interested to know what the Dynasty thinks of soulmates." The wizard asked.

He should have expected to have the question returned but he was still unprepared for it. He unconsciously ran a hand over his forearm, currently covered by a long sleeved tunic now that his mantle was discarded in favor of comfort. If he wasn't already consumed with the task of coming up with a suitable response, he would have noticed Caleb track the movement suspiciously.

"Soulmates can change between lives, so some feel more strongly about it than others." He settled on.

"And you?" Caleb echoed his earlier sentiment.

Essek sighed. "I find them fascinating."

"Really?" Caleb questioned, seemingly surprised.

"Much like the Dynasty's refusal to fully research the Beacons, they don't see the potential knowledge that can be gleaned from them," He chastised. "Perhaps it's my own stubbornness that wishes to expand my knowledge beyond that of the Dynasty."

Caleb nodded. "And what knowledge can be gained from researching soulmates?"

"I couldn't possibly know. There is extremely little information on the subject but I believe that it must relate to this Luxon as it seems to be connected to the soul." The elf began rambling in frustration. "I have found scars for a few decades now and still have no real evidence to support my claims."

"You have found marks?" The wizard asked, raising an eyebrow. "Might I see them?"

"Have you not?" Essek asked, still raising one of his arms and pulling back the sleeve to reveal the marks that have kept him up so many nights.

While he hadn't showed them off to everyone he met, Essek hadn't been embarrassed by them in the least. However, when Caleb's eyes blew open and he grasped his arm to examine them more thoroughly, he was suddenly self conscious.

"Where did you get these?" Caleb's voice was strained and panicked unlike any other time had seen him in duress.

"They- they simply appeared one day. Not all at once, but not by any will of my own. That is why I assumed they were the marks of a soulmate that I had read about." Essek hurriedly explained as the other man ran his fingers along the scars, looking them over in scrutinizing detail.

"When did it start?" He pressed, just as forceful, taking Essek's other wrist and pushing up the other sleeve to reveal the others.

"A decade or so ago? Why?" He questioned, concerned due to the other's dramatic shift in tone.

Caleb held Essek's wrists, gently running circles over the scars with his thumbs and breathing shakily. His shoulders quivered and his head hung low between them, cascading orange locks obscuring his face from view.

"Caleb? What's going on?" He practically pleaded, suddenly very worried.

Slowly, the wizard removed his hands and went about unwrapping the cloth bandages wrapped around his own arms. Essek immediately froze as nearly identical scars came into view. Once Caleb had finished, the drow carefully brought a few fingers to brush along the skin. While all of the marks on Essek's arms were flat discoloration, most of Caleb's were slightly raised.

"What-" He couldn't bring himself to finish the question, afraid of the answer.

"I-I thought-" Caleb spoke through uneven, ragged breaths. "I didn't think I had one and even if I did-"

Caleb looked down at the scars with a disgust and hatred unbefitting of such a kindhearted man. Essek gently grasped the other's wrist, and brought a hand to his cheek to force the wizard to look at him.

"Evidently, I don't go out enough to get hurt often." He chuckled in spite of himself. "I am glad to know I was drawn to you for a reason."

Caleb gave a halfhearted laugh. "Was there no reason before?"

"Well, first I thought it was curiosity," Essek paused. "Then I believed it was your wit and charm. Perhaps it had been too long since I'd had any sort of meaningful relationship."

This pulled a more genuine laugh from the wizard, making Essek smile. "Me? Charming? Surely you're thinking of someone else entirely."

"I find you very charming, Caleb Widogast." Feeling bold, leaning in slightly, letting the other retreat if wanted. He didn't.

"You are miles more charming than I could ever be, Essek Thelyss." He smirked.

Essek closed the gap between them and was bombarded with a wave of emotions and sensations. Caleb's lips were chapped - not that he minded - and he smelled of lingering smoke and a mixture of strange things used as magic components; the most prominent at the moment being incense. The wizard had responded positively to the affection, threading a callused hand into the short strands of white hair and the nape of his neck. They stayed pressed together, savoring the closeness for a long moment before separating with lidded eyes.

"How many nights have I lay awake wondering about you?" Essek mused, the fond feelings he never lingered on for long enough bloomed in his chest like a flower in spring.

"I would guess far more than you're willing to admit." The wizard teased.

"You'd be correct," Essek chuckled, pulling the other man into a tight embrace. "I think I am starting to understand what all those books were talking about."

"Hm?" Caleb breathed deeply, settling comfortably into Essek's arms.

"They said finding your soulmate is like finding another piece of yourself. Or perhaps like a kindred soul." He explained.

"Ja, my mother believed soulmates were souls meant to compliment each other perfectly." He remembered, a pain lingering in his eyes.

Essek leaned down to place a kiss at the crown of his head. "Mm. Smart woman. I think she may be right."

Caleb nodded silently, relenting to enjoy the closeness of the elf beside him. Essek sighed deeply - for once - letting himself fully relax in the presence of another person. For once, letting his guard down to cuddle with a shy, redheaded wizard.

**Author's Note:**

> I cranked this puppy out in a few insomnia driven writing sessions and I think it shows, lol.
> 
> Well, your comments and kudos are GREATLY appreciated!


End file.
